weigh in monday.

i went to bed last night dreaming of cake.  grocery store birthday sheet cake.  full of gluten.  full of sugar icing.  full of crap.

thankfully, i didn’t go to bed thinking of cake because i had eaten any. apparently, i just had a sweet tooth before bed.  no biggie.  i woke up feeling great.  there is lots of garden grown fresh watermelon in the refrigerator.  spinach ready for my morning smoothie. homemade yogurt ready to go.  i will be making healthy choices today.

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my weigh in numbers are completely boring. a big nothing.  no change.  at all.  not even a tenth.  this is an emotional week.  by the end of the week, we will know if this month “worked.”  the waiting game is the worst.  i can deal if it didn’t.  i know what that feels like.  i know how to pull myself together and be optimistic and try again.  if we are, i know that too.  keep calm, while trying to not think about our past heartbreaks.  either way, i will be fine.  this limbo.  this waiting.  this “having symptoms because of hormones that make me think i am pregnant but i may not be” is insanity.

so i go for a run.  this weather is my favorite.  this morning i laced up and went for a walk.  the last time i ran, my back was quite sore.  so i walked. it was refreshing.  the crisp cool air was exactly what my soul needed.

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i am determined to keep losing the weight.  staying in one place has never been my cup of tea. i embrace change.  change is what i need.  i need to see new numbers on the scale.  and i will.

1 comments
jetweedy
jetweedy

Keep at it! Numbers aren't everything. I've hit a bit of a stagnant spot lately just because I think I hit some metabolic changing point where I'd have to restructure my diet to keep losing overall weight, and since I'm running so much I'm hesitant to do that. But even so, I can tell from week to week that more and more of that weight is lean muscle and not belly fat. So stepping on the scale and not seeing a huge change for a couple weeks doesn't always mean you've stopped improving. It just means you're plateauing while your body shifts gears, so to speak.